Wednesday, January 25, 2006

Our passion for loudness

We are a loud nation. Our traffic rarely moves without active honking. Our heavy duty vehicles (mostly from Tata and Ashok Leyland) request you to honk well with a 'Sound Horn' painted on their backs. There are several messages that can be conveyed to the outside world with honks:

- Hey just wanted to inform you that I'm beside/behind you.
- Look out, I'm coming in from the wrong side.
- I am approaching the intersection, and not slowing down.
- Please don't crush me, I have snuck into this little gap between you and the road divider.
- Idiot, how dare you cut me off.
- Hoy why are you straying into my path.
- Hi baby, you're looking cute, standing on the roadside.
- Why is traffic in the other lane moving?
- Do you know I am in a bigger vehicle? Get out of my way.
- The light just turned green. Get moving quick.
- How long do you expect me to wait at this traffic junction? Let me go now.
- You slowed down in front of me and turned, and didn't use your indicator.
- Don't you dare start crossing the road.
- You are going too slow, so change to the other lane now and let me get ahead.
- What on earth am I doing stuck in this traffic jam.

Other sources of unwanted sounds from vehicles include loud music that gets played by 4+ wheeled vehicles when in the Reverse Gear. Do we really need to blast out popular Hindi song tunes when our cars are reversing? Or for that matter, sing Raghupathi Raghava Rajaram? If we really need to make a noise, can't we just have beeps, like what's used in heavy-duty trucks in the West? And what's with the loud beeps you hear with Remote locks. Why should our cars emit loud shrieks when we lock them?

I think our society in general has a higher tolerance for intrusive sounds. Every morning, Subbalakshmi wakes us up from the neighbourhood temples' loudspeaker systems with her suprabhatams. The suprabhatam was designed to wake up God, but apparently it's hidden strategy includes waking up all the mere mortals in the vicinity of the temple. And when it's not Subbalakshmi, it's the well-meaning neighbourhood mosque with their calls for prayers. And oh, yes - if it's a time for celebration, like a religious festival, the Government allows you take over a section of a road, install the deity and all the associated paraphernalia, and blare out all sorts of music all through the night, having no concern whatsoever for the aural sensitivities of the folks in the area.

It's not just on our streets. In my workplace, even the proximity card readers that let you in and out of offices have a beep that is too loud. Apparently, everyone is required to know when someone enters or leaves your office. And ofcourse, cellphone ringtones are rarely at a low volume. A variety of tunes are played out for the benefit (or botheration) of everyone in the work area. One can almost analyze a person's character by the ringtone he/she uses, and perhaps analyze your own character by the thoughts and emotions a ringtone invokes in you. Using Nokia's or Airtel's signature tune? how unimaginative. Using 'Hey bubbly' as a ring tone? how cruel. Using a tune from the TV serial 'Malgudi Days'? Ah, you trigger nostalgia in me. Whoa, is that Morse Code I just heard? Damn where is my Morse Code flash card when I want it? Hey isn't that Bach's Toccata and Fugue in D Minor? How dramatic. Using a romantic old Kannada movie song? Was that a message for the Kannadiga damsels around you?

For the record, I currently use Mozart's Rondo Alla Turca. Honk if you like it :)